Can Sex Be A Laughing Matter?
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I'm in a happy relationship now, but for many years I met only two types of women when I was searching for dates on dating personals. These women were girls I loved going to bed with and then there were women I just loved conversing with. Regrettably, I never met any woman that was a hilarious sex goddess.
Like Miranda Hobbes in Sex And The City, (yes...I mention this show a lot, but it always applies) I realized that I in fact was a man that found a woman either 'beautiful' or 'interesting.' And as much as I hated the fact that I proved that men from SATC actually do exist, I couldn't deny it.
One year, I had dated a woman that did things to me in the bedroom that one can only make up in a Penthouse article and then I dated a woman who fed my intellect with her knowledge and love of Balthazar Kormakur films and made me laugh when she impersonated Sarah Silverman impersonating Neve Campbell. (So uncanny!)
You would think I was living every guy's dream, however it was so frustrating to me at the time. There was something missing with each woman. Sure, the yoga instructor I was dating had me whipped with her sex appeal, however the deepest conversation I had with her was about Oprah's book list recommendations. Then there was the girl who stimulated my mind but couldn't stimulate my libido. Unfortunately, I was in bad situation. How could I tell one woman that sex was all she could offer, and the other one that I didn't find her sexually attractive?
Now I know what you're thinking: No, I am not a misogynist, I'm just vocal about things women are allowed to be vocal about with their girlfriends. If I had a nickel, for every time I heard one of my lady friends talking about how they were dating an intellectual nice guy and an asshole bad guy, then I would have a dollar and fifteen cents. It doesn't send like much, but that's a lot.
It was during this time when I realized how important sex and personality is important to a relationship. You can't have one without the other. For me, I like a woman who can make me laugh. It's so rare and it's only because so many women are afraid to make men laugh unless they feel like their personalities are all they can offer. (Again...not a chauvinist, just trying to be vocal about my observations.)
I can say now that I have found the one who makes me laugh and she is a firecracker in the sack. (Sorry honey, but you are!) Sure, some of her jokes make me cringe from time to time (again sorry...but they do) and when she's moody I'm lucky if I get sex that week, but I realized that you need to make compromises from time to time. What I'm trying to say is that you should never settle for less even if you think you will be judged for it. It doesn't matter if somebody is stellar in one area, if they don't have the whole package, then you will never be happy with them.
Related tags: News Flash: That Guy You're With Is a Pig